BUILDER: James Kenney (Hades)
DIVISION: USV (Utopian Shadow Vessel)
HISTORY: This was designed, built, and welded by James alone, with Zeus telling him every step of the way that it wouldn't be ridable. He didn't listen, and as all great chopper builders, he persisted in spite of all the odds against him such as physics and bone structure of the rider, and in the long run made Zeus eat his words. (fortunately they were chewy)

The boatman is a new style of chopper. It was designed on the idea that the pilot wanted to be face down on the tar, as close to the road as possible while riding. It has no usable seat. It has no usable handlebars. But lay down on it, grab the fork pegs, and ignore that shooting pain in your crotch, and it's actually not too bad of a ride.

The dropouts were lowered by about four inches so the pedals would not scrape against the ground, and this was done by cutting up the plate on the back of a basketball hoop. The front was extended by about three feet or more, and pegs were welded to the fork. A weight lifting bench was welded to the new long crossbar, and a pair of handlebars was placed in the head tube, but not tightened down at all. They can swivel comfortably, and are used to rest your shoulders against when going uphill. A body pillow was also added to the weight bench, so those of us with testicles could still ride this beast and maintain the option of having children at some later date.

The result is a fairly cool bike. It feels like a street luge, where you're skimming the ground, and while hills are tough, downhill is great.